I feel this blog is being sadly neglected of late as I am now spending more and more time at Mepal staying in my caravan and living in a world that appears far from my previous existence of sitting at a computer screen day in day out. But this week events unfolded that brought the two worlds aligned for a while.... we had a group of school children in from a central London school on Thursday and as we were preparing for a day of high ropes, climbing and kayaking news started filtering in of an explosion in London. At first it was simply one text message from a girl's mother but soon there was enough to warrant putting on the TV to discover just what was happening.... it became an unsettled day of listening to news unfold, carrying on as 'normal' and talking and listening to the teenagers as they in turn needed to talk through their fears and worries.... It all felt strange as the world I inhabited last year joined the world I now inhabit as I spoke to friends still living in London and working in the very areas that were targetted..... it felt personal too in an unexpected way... it felt as if it was my London that had been violated and actually Ken Livingstone put it extremely eloquently when he spoke of London as a place were you are free to be who you want to be... this is just how I feel about London and why each time I return I feel as if I am returning home... it is truely a place where you can just be... where you can be yourself without fear or recrimination... and that is what was attacked...There has been a lot of talk of the indomitable spirit of the place which is certainly true but what is also very very special about London is the sense of freedom and home that makes people from all over the world call themselves Londoners and pride themselves in the sense of belonging to the place... this to me is what was attacked... those bombs were aimed at all Londoners with absolutely no regard for religion, race, belief, status... and that's what is so senseless about it all....

so now today I sit at the computer trying to write and I feel as if I have forgotten how.... it has all become a bit meaningless