I might be being a little premature with this one but I love the design!!! and I want one!! It's an ecopod and looks gorgeous, cute and even a little funky.. trouble is it is a coffin! so hopefully I wont be occupying one for a while... but its ideal...made of paper and lined with feathers!!! and suitable for a woodland burial... now just have to find the suitable woodland

Monday and it's raining, really feels like the end of summer today... and it's cold! Very different from the weekend...

Had a Greenpeace 'workshop' on Saturday to go to ... met more lovely intelligent committed people... interesting conversation with someone who makes documentaries (Channel 4 9.00 Wednesday) and was at Cambridge, someone else was a 'home and away' addict and that was hilarious... haven't had a H& A conversation for ages!!!! (Alf Stewart is still my man!!!!) Anyway, the course was, for me, more about confidence building than anything else.. I have never been good at pushing my ideas and beliefs on people... well unless I have had too much to drink and they are close friends.... !! .... tend to think that all are entitled to their own opinion and why should they be remotely interested in what I have to say.... so this was good for me... as talking to people on the street is a very different skill to a class on map skills! So it was good.. I learned that it's more to do with Greenpeace core values and remaining calm..

The evening was interesting! I managed to be late! Well I'd had a few beers in Islington and then the Northern line was seriously delayed, not a good combination! Managed to get the food done with the excellent help of R and then The Esperanza people started arriving... food was eaten which is always a relief when you do the cooking!!.... good company!!! Looking forward to the next one in a month's time! Even enjoyed sunday, getting the place habitable again and relaxing with a newspaper and a content smile on my face............

Reading an interesting book about time ... Pip Pip by Jay Griffiths... hmmm it's written in the style of feminist polemic that I haven't touched for a few years.. that sort of playing with words and themes and vast repetitions that can get a little tiresome... such as

"Modernity's definitions of time, time accountancy, the digital clock with its flip blip for the flitting split second - the same split second- is a thing of no moment. When it comes to defining time, only the oceanic need apply. Time is simply too exquisite to be entrusted to anyone else. Only the oceanic, the Montaignes or Joyces, Shakespeares or Rousseaus, Eastern Philosophers or children. They know their now, they know the really wild vibe of the present is this; now is the only time when the moment can meet the eternal - and they know that the moment is momentous. "

a bit wordy indeed but getting further into the book I find I am re-thinking time and recognising that it is an ideological concept.. this whole linear thing.. I can remember as a child of about 8 deciding that the calender should be drawn as a spiral rather than as a linear progression as for me it all seemd vastly more cyclical...

the words are back .. and how....... so much going on in my head I don't know where to start.. so will start with a much neglected area of this blog...... recently read books...... haven't added to the list in ages and have only mentioned a couple of recent reads (James Frey and Xinran) and as I have been reading books at a rate of knots recently I need to mention a few good ones.... Bill Bryson's 'A short history of nearly everything' is exactly what it says on the cover!! But the really enjoyable thing about this book is it doesn't dumb down anything, unlike most TV documentaries nowadays, this book treats the reader as an intelligent being which is lovely and he certainly covers the history of discoveries and inventions methodically and in his amusingly anecdotal style. There will be something new for anyone who reads this book and some concepts are clearly and delightfully explained. Another romp through the sciences is Nature via Nuture by Matt Ridley.. this time looking at the old battleground of N vs N but showing the inextricable links between the two.. a sort of genetics needs environment needs genetics needs environment arguement... well put but also what amused me about this book was I suddenly found myself siding with some evolutionary psychologists ideas!! An idea previously abhorrant!!! I had always assumed (yes I know I shouldn't !!) that EP was making assumptions from the perspective of the culture we are in... ie that EP explains today's behaviour by the assumed behaviour of prehistoric man you know the idea of Man the Hunter, Woman the Home-maker, without actually having any clue about what relationships between genders was actually like... it could have been made up of female groups with offspring with only transitory visits from male groups perhaps ?? That could explain the phenomenon of group female oestrus... any way I digress....So I ended up following Ridley's argument and generally agreeing with it and then realising it was based around evolutionary pyschology.....and my assumptions about their assumptions were wrong!

Thought this was funny.. mainly because I have no 'decade'!! Obvioulsy I am just too confused and my influences are spread thin.....





what decade does your personality live in?


quiz brought to you by lady interference, ltd

anyway thanks to Damien for this one

Nine days away!!! and the reason? absolutley none... other than I have run out of words........ nothing to say.. weird....... nothing has happened, I have thought nothing........ created nothing....... talked about nothing.... hmmmmmm it's not good!

discovered a gem at the weekend!!! It was a really hot few days, one of those weekends when you need to be on the beach or on the lake at the ski club.. dead hot and I was in the middle of London! Clara suggested a Ladies Pond so after a brief look at it on the internet.. where there were one or two references to lesbian activities (?!)... we headed heathwards Saturday lunchtime... it's bit of a trek... but it was lovely being on the heath and walking through cool tree-shaded pathways.. the ladies pond is hidden away behind trees and shrubs so it is very secluded... there are grassy areas to sunbathe and the pond itself to swim in... swimming eye level to a nesting moorhen was a delightful thing to be doing on a sultry afternoon.. the water was absolutely frreeeezing... quite took the breath away but after swimming for a minute or two I warmed up a bit... I haven't been in such an all female environment since I left an all girls grammar school when I was 13... but it was lovely and calm, if there were any lesbians there they were not the predatory sort and it was quite delightful indeed... so went slightly browner with a pleasing absence of white bits... lovely

webstats.... it's interesting to see that Delilah is being read.. and thank you to Astrofish for sending a number of people this way... Love what it says about Capricorns worrying on that site! At first I wanted to say.. 'never! me? I'm such a chilled person!' but remembering the week prior to Glasto.. when I was heading off into the unknown on my own... hmmmm yes must admit to worrying a tad overmuch about it all!!!!! anyway the point to this posting is to ask people to leave the occassional comment... even maybe get a bit of a conversation going between you ?... that could be interesting.... would love to hear from you...

Whilst walking to work this morning I was pondering the new banksy statue that has been put up illegally in Clerkenwell Green… must go have a look at lunchtime…. It shows ‘justice’ as a prostitute and I was thinking how true this was and remembering my one experience as a witness to a case that became rather public… as I was thinking about what happened I realised I am still very angry about what occurred… the experience left me with a bitter taste of British justice indeed.

Simply what happened was we had a party where a number of friends, and friends of friends, turned up… much drinking of cocktails ensued and at some point a friend having had vastly too much to drink went to bed. An acquaintance ‘looked after her’ as she was vomiting and then he raped her… trouble was he didn’t think of it as rape… she did, she was unable to give either consent or to say no and in her eyes she was raped… the court saw it differently… the ‘chap’ was a handsome and intelligent rugby type from a very good family, who could afford the best defence, she was an attractive and intelligent woman but a single parent… he offered no defence, said he was too drunk to remember… so in effect didn’t deny it?? It was said in court that she ‘dressed provocatively’ yet in my eyes she wore what we all wore… jeans and a shirt?? Traces of his DNA were found on her clothes and in her hair but other DNA was also found on her clothing,(she had, though, held a friend’s baby earlier on that day?? And we all do the air kissing thing on greeting) It was implied that this DNA might have been from ‘other men’ and that she was flirting at the party… haven’t we all flirted at parties???? Anyway the outcome was he got off and to me this says that any drunken person, male or female, who falls asleep in someone’s bedroom at a party is just not safe from rape, and that he is a particularly dangerous young man, as he couldn’t remember, he could well do the same thing again after drinking?? She has since left England and hopefully is getting over it?? I am still angry… maybe writing this will assuage some of that anger at our justice system…maybe?? Maybe it just colours my view of the world …and of the British justice system… so I will go see Banksy’s new statue and read the words he has written on it…TRUST NO-ONE


Oddly when I checked the webstats on this site I see that someone arrived at my site through putting ‘banksy clerkenwell’ in a search engine… !

It's got to the point where there's almost too much to write about so I don't know where to start...

headed off to Cambridge last wednesday, having borrowed my brother's car, so had that lovely sense of freedom that having your own motorised transport brings... the weather was glorious it seemed that finally summer had arrived... I'm struggling though with the state of my flat as it really is horrible... filthy, broken furniture, doors with holes in... probably the worst flat I have ever been in .. and it's mine!! I am horrified and know it will be a massive task to get it back in shape...

anyway.. headed off to Cherry Hinton the site of the festival...put up the tents and had to head back into town for an interview with an agency... the reality of returning to Cambridge is becoming more apparent as each day passes and I still haven't really come to terms with it....

Thursday evening and I had a date with a chap from Guardian Soulmates... it had seemed like a good idea earlier on in the week but actually it was a disaster... I was enjoying being with J & J and then saw this chap that, sort of, matched his photo but, well, he obviously is massively photogenic! I nearly hid but realised that that was just too cowardly so went and introduced myself..hmmmm sometimes you just know immediately that things are a bad idea and this was one of those times... I made a feeble excuse and departed for the company of my sons.... they were really good company all weekend... funny... sweet and quite caring!!! I was really very proud of them which is a lovely, lovely thing to be able to say... Neela and Michael arrived the next morning and we found a spot for all three tents.. Sacha and Mia seemed to settle in well to festival life... the music was fairly much in the background.. I made one foray into the main stage to see Loudan Wainwright, mainly because I had seen him 31 years ago and it seemed approprite to see him again... trouble was though, my music tastes have changed a bit since then and his songs hadn't, so I just heard one song and headed away... it was a really sociable festival...the sun shone all weekend!! Sunday night we all drank a little too much but it was friendly and happy.. the people with deckchairs and territorial issues seemed to have faded into the background and we all said we would return next year!!!!

Laughed lots Saturday! Spent the afternoon dressed as a chicken and created a slight disturbance outside Sainsbury's... it was actually hilarious .... we (Greenpeace) were simply drawing people's attention to Sainsbury's non-GM-feed milk but a security guard panicked a bit and called the police... it was the closest I have ever come to being arrested and I found it all amusing rather than scary! The day was really warm and the chicken suit a little uncomfortable so I was quite happy to stop after an hour and head into New Cross where Carla lives for herbal tea and conversation... I was absolutely knackered after a late night drinking with my brother and had been up early to drive back to get to Greenwich on time.....

The evening was spent in delightful company of some Greenpeace people that had been on the MV Esperanza... food was delicious and it was a lovely evening...

and yesterday...

another Graham gig!!!! Sarah had won tickets so we went to the Islington Academy which is a very small venue headed towards the stage and waited for Graham... it was a blinding gig! His guitar work is so versatile... he seemd to go through a whole gamut of genres from 70's rock to punk to blue grass.... he also played much from Happiness in Magazines... some of his older stuff.. he was really very very very good

It's Friday afternoon and I haven't got much work to do. so what do I end up doing, apart from some Greenpeace cyberactivity, .... ended up on the quizzilla pages again.. this time absurdly looking at which film I should be in...




Fight Club!


What movie Do you Belong in?(many different outcomes!)
brought to you by Quizilla

bugger! my bike was stolen yesterday!! Very sad as I have had it years and fallen off it loads... it had become like a member of the family, it had it's faults but you accepted that and loved it just the same..... and now it's gone!!! It will probably be taken to pieces... the tyres and hubs were special, nice purple spokes!!!!... the brake system bled all the time but as an early hydraulic system it was excellent... though the quick release led to a couple of permament scars when it came loose and caught between the spokes...ahhhhhh fond (?) memories indeed, Jake coming to rescue me as my head was thoroughly bashed! Falling down some stairs on the day I bought it as I was a little too ambitious .... learning stoppies with Arthur and Lizzie... coming back from Bethnal Green and not being able to find the Rotherhithe tunnel... it had disappeared that night I'm sure!! ahhhhhhhh my bike! Thanks Josh for getting it... one of the best birthday presents ever! ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh my bike! Goodbye......... my bike

a bit of my past rushed back at me last night!! Sitting in the Mayflower with Sarah and there were people with garish t-shirts, drinking copiuous amounts of beer, wearing trainers and occassionally the word 'hashing' would float across the bar.... We had arrived a bit earlier and were astounded at how full the pub was and the oddly colourful clothing worn by the customers, most of whom seemed American, very American... we sidled away to the bar at the front of the pub, but were admittedly curious... so after a drink and when the other bar had emptied a little we headed back to satisfy the curiosity....after hearing the word Hashing I was reminded of the Hare and Hounds Hash House Harriers that I ran with a few times. This group ran in the Bedfordshire countryside, I had even set one of the routes but had not really got that involved... all got a bit awkward with one of the runners so I stopped going.... but I remember it as an amusing way to spend an evening... the people in the Mayflower, though, were taking the drinking very very seriously indeed! so of course we joined in......they are members of the west london group and run regularly....and why so many Americans?? Apparently it's an international hashing thing going on?? ....Sarah is very keen to join.. I would be apart from the fact that it does involve running! I'm not big on that...    get out of breath very quickly and my face turns lobster pink... not a good look!

Odd week.......went out Monday night initially for an after work drink then headed for the 12 bar club ...saw Paul the Girl do  a very accomplished set.... then wasn't really impressed with the next bloke and can't actually remember his name... he had something to do with Captain Beefheart.... evening then turned a little odd ..... something to do with different memories of a shared event...?
 
Wednesday saw me waiting outside Foyles for Sarah, trouble was she was waiting outside Waterstones....unfortunately I didn't have my phone......we were going to see the new Michael Moore film but ended up not meeting at all!! the positive thing out of it was that I bought a good book...... 'a million little pieces' by James Frey... a compulsive read, one of those books that is difficult to put down , so I have been walking whilst reading, cooking whilst reading, waking up at 4. 00am and picking up the book and continuing.... it is about a man's experience of rehab... but it's a fascinating insight into the world of addiction, compulsive behaviour and human dignity...It was only last night though that I realised it was not fiction..... that shocked me a bit. I mean the bit about the root canals was actually expereinced in reality???!!!!!!!!! ahhhhhhhhhhh sends all sorts of horrible shivers everywhere, in fact it might have been difficult to read that section knowing it was true....
 
Last night met up with Neela in Farringdon, after work... lovely to see you N! and am really looking forward to the Cambridge Folk Festival in a couple of weeks time.. we had an solidly good bit of food in a fish restaurant and drank perhaps slightly too much wine but hey! Compared to James Frey I am a long way from rehab........ the one t-shirt I bought at Glastonbury was a black one with the words 'Rehab is for quitters'........ I liked it because it is soooooo true It so obviously is!
 
weekend is looking promising, Hannah is over tonight and  maybe go to Shoreditch Saturday night

Somtimes, something that has always previously seemed thoroughly impossible can suddenly be presented as possible! It happened yesterday as I was working on a Greenpeace boat, The Esperanza, for an open day. The work was easy, it was a matter of talking to people about Greenpeace and particular campaigns, giving some directions around the boat and generally being helpful. This day, in itself, was wonderful as I had never really imagined I would go on board a Greenpeace boat and here I was working on it and talking to the crew, getting an insider's view... it was splendid!!! But as the day drew to a close and after the debriefing session and beer people started heading off... i too picked up my backpack and was pondering the possibility of which tube to get home when Penny one of the crew said they were having a few more beers up in the lounge and would anyone like to join them... ended up with two other volunteers and some of the crew sitting drinking beer, listening to discussions about being sprayed off the side of trawlers, how to cope if a trawler comes full speed towards you and you are swimming in the sea, being threatened by Italian captains, the sight of storm petrels zipping the tops of waves, dolphins that recognise the rainbow on the side of the boat....magic indeed!!!! and it seems it could all be possible!!!! the dream and listening to others talk could, with a bit of effort, become my reality and my conversation!! I need to be proactive and this is something worth being proactive about!!!!!!!!!

Another sight on my walk to work.... and this made me laugh and is in keeping with the surfer theme of the posts today was a new shop opened up next to Cafe 1001 in the little brewery passage.... the window is full of garishly painted surf boards!!!! a surf shop in Brick Lane!!!!!!!!!!!!! Where more suitable ......so close to the beach!!!??

Odd what we do to our children...... we want them to have better and more fulfilling lives but also if we had an excellent childhood then we like to try to replicate some of this for them..... giving security, opportunity, love, acceptance.... saw an odd sight today that made me ponder..... there must be a little private school tucked away somewhere off Worship Street as I often see very little children dressed in the type of school uniform that was becoming old fashioned when I was at school.... caps and blazers, stripey summer dresses and boaters!!! This morning in front of me was a little boy straight out of Enid Blyton in the 1950's!!! Grey socks,longish baggy navy blue shorts, blazer slightly short on the arms and a cap that barely fitted over his short back and sides. He was walking hand-in-hand with , I presume, his father. This man was wearing dirty jeans, scruffily creased, a loose long sleeved t-shirt, with a tan and the casual air of a classic cool surfer dude.. they just did not match and it seemed odd that an adult so relaxed would dress his child in so regulated a fashion... is he providing something to rebel against.. is that what he looked like aged 5 and he is giving his child all the 'benefits' he had??? hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm seems things have got somewhat reversed from when I was at school and it was the parents who looked old and stuffy....

Post-Glasto sleeping sickness is finally over. I feel alive again and wide awake!! Though certainly didn't Friday night as Sarah and I met up for drinks at The Foundry and went on to 93 feet east... sadly all I could do was sit in a comfortable sofa and watch people.... there was a band playing, a film, Jubilee, and I just wasn't up to any of it!!!!

Went to Cambridge Saturday and oddly ended the evening in a gay pub lock in.... drinking shooters and odd stuff........ almost adopted a new son..... had a wonderful time!!!

Always feel somewhat bereft leaving the boys and returning to London though, and that is the mood today, feel it's all very superficial here.........! Need to find a more substantial job....

Sarah is off pole dancing tonight!!!! Has signed up for a course!!!!!

This is my 200th posting!! Which actually, considering I have been writing this since Oct 2002 really doesn't seem that many.......

Heading Shoreditch way tonight for drinks and food....... to celebrate stuff with Sarah.. t'wil be good....... last night ended up having a few after-work drinks as the Godlike one is leaving to go to the US to work for Ralph Lauren....it was all getting a bit raucous when I sidled away mid evening... am I becoming a lightweight??? or is it post-Glasto sleeping sickness???

Still can't work out how I feel about coming back to London.. it is odd when you go away and eventually you look forward to getting 'home'.... but coming back to London just didn't feel like coming 'home' it feels like an extension of being away??? Where is home, what is this thing that gives a sense of belonging?? Is it familiarity within the environment... an increasing recognition of places the closer you get to home.. or the initmate knowledge of a place? knowing all its alley-ways and back streets, of shortcuts and splendid vista's... or is it more a feeling? a place you feel safe? a place you feel warm? Still have to find my home I guess.... then I might know the answers???????