Monday again .... and once again the weather has been wonderful! Even dozed off in the sun on saturday afternoon!


It has been a quieter weekend, went to a party in Maida Vale friday night...... it was Jamie's, Pete's mechanic, 30th birthday...... fairly pleasant affair, nice to see Nina again. As Nina is Matty's girlfirend and Matty has been in Dubai for 5 or 6 weeks she hasn't been around but she will venture to the bike shop for next friday's bike do...... definitely want more females to go as the conversation does become rather biased towards biking things with a pile of leatherclad bikers discussing weird stuff about the greasy workings of supermotards....... ?

Sunday was Mothers Day so I had to go home and be a mother! J &J cooked roast lamb... it was very pleasant though I found their insistence that I could not help quite difficult to cope with!

the afternoon

what is going on in the world of knickers????? Is it that long ago I bought new ones? but had a little wander into the Grafton centre to purchase a number of such items and find the choice is limited to thongs or big pants, there seems little in between and maybe I'm just too old or not so very adaptable but thongs are a laughable commodity and I can never forsee the day when I would purchase something that will sit uncomfortably in my bottom all day long, it just doesn't make sense and so I am unable to conform to that present little fashion pecadillo. But big pants! ahhhhhh cant cope with them either??

hmmmm yes H had a scan but didn't see it herself, though J did... this must be so traumatic?? a very difficult time for both of them

and on to another matter only somewhat ambiguously linked...... favourite babies names! well maybe not all of them are serious, or any in fact!

Murdo......... can you imagine a child at school being called this!!!!!
Mungo......
Shebah........
Yitsak........ had to have that one on the list
Noah... met one the other day, he was tall and extremely skinny with a very big nose
Murdoch....... seem to be having a run on names starting with Mu for some reason
Lili...........
Neemah......think I made that one up?
and last but not ever forgotten
Nebuccanezzah....... though think this one could be spelt in sooooooo many different ways

Its probably a good job I am planning no more myself!!!

Friday and the sun is shining....... had another job interview this week and once again didn't get it. next week I'm going for yet another one, this time as a receptionist! But it pays as much as anything else I've applied for, it's in Moorgate which will be 20 minutes away and so I will go along for the interview... dont really want it though, I dont want to be an invisible person. Sometimes wonder if I will ever be regarded, in employment terms, as anything more than fluffy... dont ever seem to get interviews for jobs I actually want, for positions that will challenge and not leave me bored to tears after a couple of months?? Will have to concentrate on stuff outside work but I do feel that I am a vast underdeveloped potential..... I managed to get a good degree whilst working and being a single parent of two kids. so why am I only considered capable of 'meeting and greeting' ordering lunches and shuffling paper around? How on earth do I get a foot into a more interesting world?

the weekend has been good........... weather has been more than springlike, there have been positive hints of summer about some of it. I was actually wandering around with naked shoulders! and this is still March! Actually cleaned up Pete's patio furniture and basked whalelike on his balcony for a while which was very pleasant.......

Had a new toy to play with... a quad bike that is 'street-legal' it has indicators, lights and is registered for road use!!! Very nippy between cars! Ok to drive/ride it with a car license but still need to wear a helmet......

The boat........... it moved!! it didn't really go far but is now facing the opposite direction! Unfortunately because there is so little ballast the rudder is out of the water...... so you cant steer it!! As this type of boat is basically meant to carry tons of cargo it is easier to steer when full..... so we need to either pour concrete into it or some similarly heavy stuff! Apparently for the purist concrete isn't such a good idea ......... I guess because once set its impossible to move?? Anyway Island Hope is rather a heap at the moment -an unsteerable heap!! hmmmmmmmmm it's going to be an interesting summer.

so whilst I'm worrying about what bathroom to install and what colour flooring, this country is at war. At war not defending anyone or any principle, but at war because ........ why? Because the US wants to retain power.... and the UK just follows along....... and people in Baghdad write blogs describing their daily lives. We are told we are on terror alert but the threat doesn't come from the people of Baghdad, the very people we are bombing, they are more concerned with survival and Iraq, as a nation, does not have the weaponry to damage our lives. And yet we are at war...........

Just added a new blog to look at ... this one is a blogger in Baghdad, definitely an interesting perspective!

Get the boat tomorrow! We're busy having conversations that include stuff like, 'well just how big is a bathroom?' and 'howabout purple rubber flooring?' hmmmmm

The weather is so glorious at the moment I'm struggling to stay inside at work, desperate to be outside.

Taking my CBT very soon, so I will be able to ride up to a 125 cc bike which should be cool!! Do I need leather trousers I wonder, can I face the thought of leather trousers???!!!!

Godfather gig tonight, to go or not to go, that is the question........

Reading 'How to be good' by Nick Hornby

....... (continuing the theme of past events and catching up)......

friday found me watching some of the comic relief stuff in the offices of the Flying Squad!! This provided as much interesting conversation as was on the TV! In fact it was a bit like being in The Bill or some such similar cop programme, with burly blokes wandering around in t-shirts and bullet proof vests, ordering pizza's and discussing the rights and wrongs of shooting villians! Ended up there simply because Pete had been putting some cheques into his bank account when the bank was robbed. He got out and the area was cordoned off as the bank robbers were stuck inside the building. Trouble was his motorbike was left outside the bank not locked to anything..... so he imagined that as soon as the area was 'uncordoned' (? now is that a real word?) the bike would be stolen. So we went back in the evening to see if we could rescue it. As soon as the police discovered he was an actual witness they decided they needed a statement from him, even though he really hadn't seen anything, hence my hanging around watching tv ......anyway we got the bike back, the robbers were arrested and comic relief was its usual somewhat antclimatic self..........

More importantly!!!!!!!!!!!! finally got to see inside the boat 'Island Hope'... and Pete is buying it at this very moment in time (I hope) so my new home will be a 70 ft by 14 ft Humber barge!!! Needs lots of work too! mmmmmm will have to develop new skills... like welding!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Saturday. and the last couple of days have been interesting indeed, in a somewhat dramatic way! hmmmm where to start??

Last posting was thursday..... soon after that I phoned home and discovered that Jake had been run over!! A hit and run no less!! Ahhhhhhh apparently the previous night J,J and Hayley were out, Jake set off for the Cow to get a carryout and got hit by a car, he doesn't seem to remember much about it, but apparently he actually got thrown over the roof and landed head first behind the vehicle which sped off into the night. This was on Kings Street a quiet little one way street in the centre of Cambridge. The car behind pulled up and called an ambulance Josh and Hayley arrived to find Jake unconscious!! He sort of came around quite quickly but has broken his collar bone..... so that means at least 6 weeks of rest, no work!

Thursday again...!

Second interview yesterday and once again I thought it went well but but but..... they said they would make the decision yesterday and let me know... I still haven't heard! This either means I'm still in the running and they are having a tough job deciding OR........ I was so crap they can't be bothered to communicate with me ever again!!!!! Will the mobile ring????????

Heard a seagull yesterday too.... in central London, so it's not just a seaside thing!

Had an excellent meal last night in a little deli in Rotherhithe....... only one menu, 5 tables....... very 'inimate' indeed! Got talking to others and ended up, after dinner, having a look in a gallery at one of the fellow diners latest exhibition. Jane Deakin's paintings were colourful, some very big. ... mostly flowers and still life with a few landscapes and abstracts........... interesting work! A good way to spend an evening!

Just bought Exhibitionism by Toby Litt a very amusing read

hmmmmm had a job interview yesterday....... it is so difficult to tell how well it all went, would it be too confident to say it went well? It seemed to, but who knows?? I will find out soon enough next week..... now feel the need to apply for loads more as it has really boosted my confidence......... went shopping too, for 'proper' clothes......... avoided the black suit thing and ended up getting a light grey suit with a pink t-shirt. barely appropriate I know but cant change totally overnight! Got a pink coat too which I utterly love!!! it is absolutley gorgeous and as I have avoided this whole shopping thing studiously for so many years it was a pure delight to be frivolous!

Trying to add some books to the list and it's just not working so will add them here in the meantime

Monday, March 03, 2003

Monday, back at work again. Got here at 10.15 which was a bit late, trains seemed particularly slow.......

The weekend was good, think we might have found our boat.. a 70ft x 14ft dutch barge that is moored in north London, very very rusty with broken windows and not too pretty at the moment but it could be just what we are looking for... the size is good and it supposedly has a good hull.. could be my next home! The plan is to live there straight away albeit in a very basic way and get it weatherproof by the winter. Hopefully we'll get a mooring in Greenland Dock...I have a very idealised image of this lifestyle, hopefully reality will not be too different........ really looking forward to doing it up to live in, working with Pete should be good. We seem to have very similar ideas about the design of it and materials we want ........

An observation....... there are always seagulls living inland... see a few flying past my bedroom window in Cambridge on a regular basis...... but realise that one thing that signifies being 'at the seaside' is the raucous cry of gulls.......the smell of the sea and the call of the seagulls somehow are inextricably linked..... now I suddenly realised that inland gulls do not make the same easily identifiable noise?????? Is it that I just don't hear it, blanking it out with all the other urban sounds perhaps? or do gulls only make a noise when at the seaside?

Friday again.. this week has passed blissfully quickly. It has mostly been taken up with looking for jobs, making some online applications... not much feedback so far but I'm still hoping.

Wednesday, Pete drove the fun car to Cambridge and I was quite surprised by the reactions received as we drove around town, they were the same as the Bermondsey reactions!! Something about the car makes people want to leap up to us at junctions asking details about it's engine, or to call out 'nice car' whilst we are driving along. It brings out really positive, happy comments from people. I have travelled around in cute old cars before like Phil's Austin 7 but that never attracted half the attention of the fun car!! Somehow I was surprised that it illicited the same response from Cambridgians as the rather more vocal south Londoners. Odd!

What was even odder was returning home to find Josh and Hayley playing Scrabble... seemed so civilised and 'couply' -very sweet!!!! Love ya loads Josh! (I know you are reading this so I have probably embarrased you even more. But I do think that that is one of my main functons now you are an adult...... still haven't brought out the really cute but very naked pictures of you as a chubby toddler!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and then there was Jake! Well he had been a quiet child but now seems to be ummmmmmmm well shall I blame Jackass????? He had another blackeye this morning, over and above the one that was slowly disappearing..... and how did hew get it? Well at least this time he didn't hit himself but it sounds stupidly similar, he was 'larking around'?? whatever that means??......... no hope!

So I am off to London again for the weekend......

mmmm having a problem with the phrase 'at your age'. what does this mean? What sort of behaviour is 'suitable' for someone my age? This weekend I have been clubbing. Pete and I went to 'the fridge' a club in Brixton. We got there about 2 am and danced until the end... it was bloody good...... clubs are different nowadays.......... there's lots of water to consume for one, a chillout area and whether it was just this night but there was loads of space to dance.This was quite difficult as i am used to doing my stuff within a confined space within a heaving mass of humanity. i found it really difficult to dance on the periphery, felt too alone. so had to head into the center where there was at least a semblance of a heaving mass.... even tho' people around sort of stopped every so often to drink/socialise/ have a cup of tea???. Realise why it's called the fridge tho', the air contitioning was incredibly efficient, at times it was actually quite chilly!......anyway it was good to dance. Left about 6am and then 5 minutes later the van ran out of petrol. This entailed us wandering around Brixton at 6 am looking for a petrol station. Actually realised this is a rather lovely time to be up, haven't been up at this time for ages. it's a sort of refreshing start to the day.....


Later found us having lunch within sight of Tower Bridge and that strange poddy-looking building that is at present being erected in central London. What is it? Anyway the food was excellent, and the wine went down incredibly well, so we staggered laughingly back, stopping in 'The Mayflower' for further alcohol - probably not wise but rationality becomes diminished after a lunchtime bottle of wine...... now back at Pete's in Rotherhithe......listening to 'Parklife' by Blur and realise it is nothing other than a classic! So it has been an utterly wonderful weekend!!!

Electronic dependency can be quite onerous!!!!!!!!! My 'home' email system is down and I find it utterly frustrating to not be able to read my daily emails...... not that there will be anything there of any great importance but at least there is the potential! A bit like getting the phone cut off in days of yore when it was the only form of immediate communication with the outside world..... as a single parent the telephone was my lifesource, vitally important on the many nights that there was no baby sitter arranged and as I was the single adult representative in my household it was imperative that I communicated beyond its confines or I would have gone mad. Well maybe it's not quite so bad today that I dont have email. I am, after all, at work, communicating with other adults on a daily basis and I have my mobile phone in my pocket so communication is also possible from elsewhere..... so what am I moaning about??????? Think it's merely a matter of the loss of potential, rather than the cutting of my lifeline-to-the-world scenario that having the phone cut off used to represent. hmmmmmmm will go back to work and stop moaning, things are sooooo much better than they used to be which is a cheery note to end on.

Further escapades of Josh and Jake: it gets worse!! hmmmmmmmm this motherhood thing has become hmmmmm shall we say ... tiresome! I have a small flat that I live in in the week whilst spending the weekends in London. My two sons, with now the addition of a girlfriend, are living there full-time. So I arrive back Monday night after work to find......... dishes neatly stacked, unwashed, above the dishwasher, a whole weekend's worth........ a bathroom floor that is no longer visible because of books, clothing, magazines and general debris....... all the windows wide open because, I guess, someone has been smoking....... a lounge that looks like it is the repository for an Indian restaurant's left-overs and then as I survey the carnage the phone rings..... it is blockbuster video kindly reminding me that there are videos due back amassing vast sums of arrears.But that is not all!

Last night they went to see a show with Steve-O from Jackass...... Jake now has a black eye and Josh was thoroughly beaten up, after being thrown out of the theatre! I haven't actually seen him yet, he was hiding this morning, tho' apparently he has a couple of cuts to the face and some bruising!! After going to the theatre!!!!!!!!!!!!!